Screamers, Demeanors, Schemers …

October 28, 2010 by Leave a Comment

This gal knows her stuff! Some good ideas here. PGB

Oct. 28, 2010

Bosses Who Revel in Subordinate’s Misery

By TORY JOHNSON, ABC News Workplace Contributor

If you have a bully for a boss, you’re among the many people who probably dread going to work every day. The bullying can come in many forms, and from bosses who have their own unique style of bringing the pain. Some supervisors love to yell and scream, while others revel in humiliating their employees. Some workers also say that their bosses have schemed behind their backs to undermine their performance.

The Screamer: Sadly, at one point, we’ve all worked for or with screamers. Excessive yelling definitely makes for a toxic work environment. This type of boss doesn’t need a reason to yell. It’s just his or her style to scream at will.

Walk Away: Best solution is to stand up for yourself by walking away from a tirade. Bullies only scream at people they perceive to be weak — people who’ll easily take it. As a kid, you may have had to sit still and take it from a parent, but not so at work. Refuse to subject yourself by walking away, going to the restroom, grabbing a cup of water, stepping outside. This is especially helpful if you’re on the verge of getting emotional, which you don’t want to do. Above all, remember that when you do nothing, when you just sit there and take it, you’re giving the bully permission to continue. By doing nothing, you’re saying, “This is OK,” even though it’s not.

The Demeaner: The demeaner makes humiliating comments — “You’re such an idiot.” “Could you be any dumber?” “My kids could do this better and faster than you any day.” This person also uses humiliating gestures — rolling their eyes, using their hands dismissingly. This kind of toxic boss might also laugh at your ideas to belittle you. This kind of boss is particularly vexing because one of the most important characteristics that drives our excellence at work is our confidence in ourselves and our abilities. When we’re demeaned, we naturally second-guess ourselves and our worth. That means we don’t perform our best work. So it’s counterproductive for the boss to treat people this way on the job, even though he or she doesn’t see it. Confront Calmly: If you work for a small business, there isn’t an HR department to complain to about this, which means it’s up to you to tackle it directly with the boss. Sit down with the boss and tell him or her that you’re very proud of your skills and abilities and you’re especially proud of the results you generate in this role — and you know the company does good work. But you’re curious as to why someone who is so successful would resort to bully tactics when it accomplishes nothing. Make it clear that you don’t mind constructive criticism but when you do X, Y, Z, it’s not conducive to performing at your very best. If you go this route, make sure you share very specific examples. Instead of asking, “Why are you a bully?” say, “When you laugh at my ideas, call me this name, and compare me to your kids — like you did on these four occasions — those specific actions and comments prevent me from giving you and this company my absolute best. And I want very much to over-deliver for you, so I’d respectfully request that you stop doing this.” Stick just to facts delivered in a reasoned manner.

The Schemer: The schemer attempts to undermine your status by repeatedly withholding key information from you, excluding you from e-mail distributions, and intentionally leaving you out of meetings when you ought to be in the loop. The schemer nitpicks and micromanages, somehow always finding fault with your work, and fails to give you credit for the good work you do. A demanding boss can push you to deliver the best and can set the bar high with big expectations for excellence, but the schemer is never satisfied because of barriers that he or she puts in your way.

Document Details: Complaining about these toxic tactics can make you seem petty — “Oh, I wasn’t invited to the meeting; oh, the boss never told me about this” — so to avoid that impression, you want to document the details over time. It could be a couple of weeks or even a month where you write down exactly what happened, when, where and any witnesses, so it’s all spelled out in meticulous detail. Keep copies of any supporting documentation. That prevents you from being brushed off as a petty complainer or thin-skinned. Depending on the size of your organization, you’ll bring this to HR or you may have to go directly to the boss. You’re not just going to report this behavior, but also going to demonstrate that it’s impacting your work because it has created an uncomfortable or even hostile work environment. Even though bullying has been proven to be costly to the company’s bottom line, which is why they should take action to nip this behavior, don’t expect HR to be instantly on your side. HR works for the company’s benefit, not that of any individual employee. If you don’t find satisfaction, you may have to contact a labor lawyer who can advise you on your situation.

Walk -Away Time

So many people have told me in recent days and months that they’re really stuck on this one. They can’t afford to quit — and they’re afraid they won’t easily find a new job, which is very natural — but they’re also at a breaking point in an unhealthy environment. While I’d never cavalierly tell anyone to walk away from a paycheck without a financial safety  net, there are two considerations:

1. Your mental health and self-esteem are far more important than any one position. As hard as it may be to pound the pavement while unemployed, you always can get a new job but it’s far more challenging to rebuild your crushed confidence and your declining health.

2. Focus on plotting your Plan B right now as a positive distraction while you’re still employed. Get serious about job searching or starting your dream business to go out on your own. Just knowing that you’re taking steps to make a change — and bring an end to this misery — will likely make you feel better. Doing nothing and feeling trapped is the worst. You have choices — make them.

Support Co-Workers: Even if you’re not subjected to a toxic boss, as colleagues we shouldn’t sit silent while our co-workers are subjected to this form of bullying. Let someone know that you see what they’re going through and you’ll support them any way you can.

Seek Help: If you’ve done everything you can to no avail, seek professional help. This may be from your state’s labor department, a lawyer or a counselor to weigh your options.

Filed Under: DISPATCHES, WORKPLACE BULLYING Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

One in Eight Health Workers Bullied in Britain

October 20, 2010 by Leave a Comment

Here’s a BBC story of a recent survey of health workers that shows almost one in eight experience bullying or harassment. The department adopted a workplace bulllying policy in 2008. PGB

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Health staff ‘suffering bullying’

By Justin Parkinson; Political reporter, BBC News

Almost one in eight Department of Health staff have experienced bullying or harassment at work, a civil service survey suggests.

The survey also reports that nearly one in 10 workers say they have experienced discrimination.

The survey of more than 2,000 civil servants was carried out last year, with staff asked questions about the previous 12 months.

A department spokesman said there was “no place” for abuse at work.

Of the 2,057 staff who responded to a question on whether they had personally experienced discrimination at work during the past

year, 9% said they had. Some 84% said they had not and 7% preferred not to say.

‘Dignity and respect’

Asked the same question about bullying and harassment, 2,056 people replied. Some 12% said they had experienced such problems, while 83% had not and 6% would not say.

The Civil Service-wide People Survey was carried out for the first time from October to November last year.

The Department of Health’s own previous staff survey results are not directly comparable, as employees were asked to confirm that they had “not” personally experienced bullying or harassment over the previous three months.

Over the period from June 2008 to June 2009, the proportion agreeing to this statement increased from 74% to 84%.

The spokesman said: “All Department of Health staff have the right to be treated with consideration, fairness, dignity and respect. There is absolutely no place in the workplace for abuse of any sort.

“We launched our Bullying and Harassment policy in March 2008 to emphasise that any form of bullying or harassment is unacceptable and procedures for how employees can raise a complaint.

“We will continue to monitor the situation through regular staff surveys. Any cases of bullying or harassment will be fully investigated and appropriate disciplinary action will be taken.”

Story from BBC NEWS:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/uk_news/politics/8509932.stm

Published: 2010/02/11 09:21:24 GMT

Filed Under: DISPATCHES, WORKPLACE BULLYING Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Chef Ramsay or Donald Trump?

October 20, 2010 by Leave a Comment

This is a story from the BBC News Magazine about workplace bullying. The story compares Chef Gordon Ramsay from Hell’s Kitchen and the British host of The Apprentice, Alan Sugar. The format of Trump’s show is similar to that of Sugar’s. PGB

Just what is bullying?

By Rajini Vaidyanathan, BBC News Magazine

Everybody has been in an office where tempers were lost and swearing occurred on an occasional basis. But what distinguishes the acceptable boisterousness that characterises some workplaces with downright bullying?

Shouting, screaming, swearing, ignoring or behaviour designed to embarrass.

Has your boss done any of the above to you, and if so, did you shrug it off as normal office behaviour, or consider it something far more serious?

In a new book, Prime Minister Gordon Brown has been accused of workplace bullying after a number of alleged incidents. He is said to have grabbed staff by the lapels, shoved them aside and shouted at them.

Mr Brown admits he can get angry, and is determined and strong willed, but denies he is a bully.

So where is the line drawn between being assertive in the workplace and being labelled a bully?

Defining where that line is, and when it is crossed, can be difficult. If you’ve failed to meet your project deadline, should your boss take you to one side and sweetly tell you you didn’t make the grade, or does he or she have a right to shout at you and demand answers?

In the various interpretations of workplace bullying, there is a common thread – it is when the behaviour humiliates and offends the victim, is a personal attack, and is an abuse of power.

The Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development, which represents recruitment experts, defines it as this:

  • “Bullying at work involves repeated negative actions and practices that are directed at one or more workers.
  • “The behaviours are unwelcome to the victim and undertaken in circumstances where the victim has difficulty in defending themselves.
  • “The behaviours may be carried out as a deliberate act or unconsciously. These behaviours cause humiliation, offence and distress to the victim.”

Ramsay rollicking

But even then, it can be hard to know what distinguishes an ebullient manager from a bullying boss.

“Strong managers are given power because they are managers,” says Lynn Witheridge, chief executive of the Andrea Adams Consultancy which was set up to deal with workplace victimisation. “It’s their job to use and to wield it but not to abuse.”

For many people, the embodiment of an irascible boss is TV chef Gordon Ramsay, or Alan Sugar, who wields the firing finger in the BBC’s The Apprentice. Both have formidable characters and don’t hesitate to deliver withering comments.

But by Ms Witheridge’s definition only Ramsay’s approach could be considered a form of workplace bullying.

“He is absolutely [a bully] because it becomes personal… he uses swearing, and shouts at people saying they’re thick.”

Sugar, however, is not, she says.

“He has to pick the very best but it doesn’t get personal. He doesn’t use personal traits and accuse them of being thick… he strongly manages them.”

But others might see the behaviour of the head chef as entirely reasonable, given the pressurised environment of a professional kitchen.

Kitchen tempers

Most people understand that at busy times, it is high tension, says Jenny Stringer, acting managing director of Leiths School of Food and Wine.

“You need to be quite vocal, depending on the kitchen you need to speak loudly. I don’t think that’s what anyone means by bullying,” she says.

There’s a clear difference between yelling orders at people and operating normal quality control, and repeatedly physically confronting a single member of staff, she notes.

It’s not just in kitchens that tempers are frequently raised. Shouting at someone who is late to meet their deadline might not seem out of place in a newspaper office, or in a trading room where a certain level of robustness is expected.

Neil Addison, a barrister who specialises in harassment cases, says context is key.

“What might not be bullying in the barrack room, might be harassment in a school. If you’re training for the SAS there’s no point complaining that a sergeant is shouting at you because that’s what goes with the job.

“But if you’re a teacher in a school or a worker in an office there’s no reason for your boss to shout at you.”

Some of those who have experienced workplace bullying say the stereotype of being barked at by a short-tempered boss is missing the point. It can manifest itself in a more subtle, yet sustained, manner.

Mark, who worked for a private firm that was contracted by the NHS several years ago, became a victim.

“It wasn’t a question of pushing and shoving, but it was nasty stuff.

“There was an attempt to to show you up in meetings. Saying to your face you didn’t know what you were talking about, putting self-doubt in your mind.”

Yet when he tried to raise the issue, he was given the brush off.

Playground ring

“I tried to do the right thing and reported it to HR. They told me it wasn’t bullying. They said ‘it’s just your boss, it’s the way he is’.”

Mark eventually took voluntary redundancy, and now runs his own antiques business.

“I got to the point where I went off for a while with stress. I was unable to do my job.

“This kind of background bullying, it isn’t as overt as someone standing yelling at your face from two inches away. It hits you in the guts. You think ‘maybe I’m making this up’.”

Part of the problem could be the label of “bullying” which comes with a good deal of emotional baggage, says Lynn Witheridge.

“People are so fearful of using this word. The childish connotations of the word makes them feel weak or a trouble-maker.”

Story from BBC NEWS:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/8528422.stm

 

Published: 2010/02/22 15:32:36 GMT

Filed Under: CULTURE, DISPATCHES, WORKPLACE BULLYING Tagged With: , , , , Chef Ramsey,

Alleged Bullycide of Wisconsin Woman Prompts Bill

October 11, 2010 by Leave a Comment

April 7, 2010

Amid emotional testimony, bill targets workplace bullying

By DEE J. HALL

In 2008, 31-year-old Jodie Zebell appeared to have a full life. The UW-Madison graduate was married with two young children and a part-time job as a mammographer at a La Crosse clinic, where she was praised as a model employee.

But soon afterward, Zebell became the target of co-workers who unfairly blamed her for problems at work. After she was promoted, the bullying intensified, her aunt Joie Bostwick recalled during a legislative hearing Wednesday attended by members of her niece’s family, including Zebell’s mother, Jean Jones of Spring Hill, Fla.

After her niece had a run-in with her supervisor, Bostwick said, the boss joined in the harassment, filling Zebell’s personnel file with baseless complaints about her performance and loudly criticizing her in front of others.

“This went on for a series of months,” said Bostwick, a Blue Mounds native who now lives in Naples, Fla. “It just got worse and worse.”

On Feb. 3, 2008, the day before she was to receive a poor job review, Jodie Zebell allegedly committed bullycide – took her own life as a result of depression over bullying. A Madison attorney told the family it had no legal recourse since she wasn’t protected from workplace discrimination as would be an older worker or a racial, ethnic or religious minority.

“We were astounded to find there was nothing we could do. There were no laws unless you were part of a protected class,” Bostwick said.

The tragedy sparked Zebell’s family to join a national movement seeking to ban bullying from workplaces and give victims — who prefer to call themselves “targets” — tools to stop the harassment or sue abusive employers and bullies in court.

Abusive conduct

On Wednesday, the Assembly Labor Committee heard 90 minutes of often emotional testimony on a bill sponsored by state Rep. Kelda Roys, D-Madison, that would require employers to implement and enforce anti-bullying policies — or face their abused employees in court.

Seventeen states are considering such legislation, according to the Workplace Bullying Institute of Bellingham, Wash., whose director, Gary Namie, also testified at the hearing.

Under the proposal, workers who believe they have been harmed by “abusive conduct” could sue to force the employer to stop the bullying, to seek reinstatement or to get compensation for lost wages, medical costs, attorneys’ fees, emotional distress and punitive damages.

The bill defines abusive conduct as “repeated infliction of verbal abuse, verbal or physical conduct that is threatening, intimidating or humiliating, sabotage or undermining of an employee’s work performance or exploitation of an employee’s known psychological or physical vulnerability.”

Vaguely worded bill

Representatives of business groups told the committee the bill is too vaguely worded and would invite frivolous lawsuits by disgruntled and incompetent workers.

“AB 894 paints a target on the back of small employers … (who) can’t afford to fight claims in circuit courts,” said Pete Hanson, director of government relations for the Wisconsin Restaurant Association.

Andrew Cook of the Wisconsin Civil Justice Council, a consortium of large business groups, agreed. Cook said if Wisconsin becomes the first state to pass such a bill, it would harm the state’s ability to attract business.

Emotional stories

But at the hearing, such concerns were largely overshadowed by these stories:

• A Spanish teacher testified she was “iced out and isolated” for four years by older colleagues in her school district. Once a marathon runner, Susan Stiede now suffers from clinical depression, chest pain, panic attacks and symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. She quit teaching in 2009.

• A nervous Stephanie Endres told of being harassed by a unnamed female boss in a state agency that she declined to name. Intimidated by Endres’ knowledge of the agency, the new supervisor circulated untrue rumors about her, Endres said, banished her to an office with no phone and separated her from her co-workers. When Endres took a six-month stress leave, the supervisor started bullying other members of the staff, she said.

• Dr. Deborah Lemke told lawmakers of an unnamed Wisconsin hospital where the nursing supervisor verbally bullied nurses on his staff. When she intervened on behalf of the nurses, Lemke said, holding back tears, she herself became a target.

Corliss Olson, associate professor at the UW-Extension’s School for Workers, said the bill is “desperately” needed.  Olson said most targets of bullying are “normal, competent people” who can be driven to disability or even death.  “This is a viciousness in the workplace that we need to stop,” Olson said. “We can and we must change our workplaces so they are civil.”

FROM: WISCONSIN STATE JOURNAL

Filed Under: BULLYCIDE, DISPATCHES, WORKPLACE BULLYING Tagged With: , , , , , Jodie Zebell, verbal abuse, Wisconsin